1503/29th March 2024 A hacking cough recently persuaded me to seek further help from the Ear, Nose and Throat department. Previous visits having led nowhere, I agreed to allow the Gastroenterology folk to investigate the next segment of the troub…
A hacking cough recently persuaded me to seek further help from the Ear, Nose and Throat department.
Previous visits having led nowhere, I agreed to allow the Gastroenterology folk to investigate the next segment of the troublesome pipe.
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Digestive Health, as they are also called, are not my favourite set. I have given them many chances to redeem their reputation, but perhaps I am a hard case.
The nun who attempted to force boarding school stodge into me told me that if I was not careful, I would have difficulties later in life.
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She disliked me, but I think she would have stopped short of putting a curse on me.
It wasn't just me. She disliked everyone. I am sure I never saw the woman smile once in the two years I was there.
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She really ought not to have been a teacher. One morning when she was quizzing us about our history homework, no-one seemed to have any answers.
She slammed her book closed and flounced off in a great flurry of black robes retorting:
"I'll leave you to wallow in the slime of your ignorance!"
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Being average horrible 15-year olds, we thought this was tremendously funny.
My desk was by a window and glancing out, I saw my friend Phyllis looking out of her classroom around the corner. I made faces at her which made her laugh and won me a detention.
After school I reported with the other miscreants.
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One was in trouble for escaping and having a rendez-vous with a boy. Her punishment didn't stick and she finished by being expelled. Horrors!
My task was to write an essay, about the sound grass makes when it grows.
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This, I believe was supposed to be a challenge, but when the invigilator came back half an hour later, I was still writing.
Tenors, sopranos, no doubt a chorus of some kind, I've long since forgotten. I know I thought it was rather good but it was received without comment.
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The head mistress was actually quite nice to me. She wrote in my report that I was "mature beyond my years."
Maybe she hadn't heard about me making cabbage faces at Phyllis.
When Christmas came around again, I went off to New York to meet my aunt and uncle. For some reason this was viewed with surprise but apparently I set a trend.
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At JFK a few years later, I found myself in charge of an unaccompanied school girl. She was wearing her blazer and I recognised it immediately.
She told me that the miserable old cow was now the headmistress. I could just imagine, if the girl went back and said she had met me, the woman would have raised an eyebrow and thought:
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